Feel in the dumps b/c I am dissapointed by myself.

Recently, I often hate myself. I feel that I have to go beyond what I can do right now. But, I often end up doing my routine.

"For now," which is a very attractive and scary phrase.

I'm trying to do something. But, I don't. Why? Because I don't have enough time. Then, I'm doing something else. And I'm grumbling... I think I'm so lame.

Maybe all I have to do is forget the phrase "for now." Then, I should try to work on what I really want to do.

Summer Vacation

Most Japanese business people are taking their vacations next week. But, I'm not. I don't know if it is good. If I take a vacation, I want to go abroad. But, airplane tickets during the holiday season are kind of pricey.

Why I write

I just don't like the summer in Tokyo. It's too muggy, which often irritates me and helps me lose motivation to anything. I mean "anything," not "something." I can't do anything I really want to do or I've got to do.

Well, I know. You may have this golden question in your head. You would say, "So, why are you writing this terrible entry in poor English, outrageous2007?" Right. Your question is so sagacious that I don't think I have the right to answer it. All I can say now is I'm pretty much absent-minded and I don't know what to write and what I'm writing, much less why I'm writing.

Anyway, let me tell you a little bit about writing. Although I can't speak English as fluently as most of returnees and those who have lived in the states or other English speaking countries for many years, writing English is a pain (Maybe, reading my terrible English might be a pain for you, my friend). It's neither because I have a great command of the English language or because I can write good English. It's just because writing is part of my life, which nobody can eliminate from me.

Wherever I am, whoever is around me, no matter what language I use, I will write. I don't know why I'm writing or what is making me do so. I write something. That's it.

kind of happy

I have been away from this blog for a long time for some reason. But, today I just felt like writing something here.

Today I had one thing that pleased me. I talked with a middle-aged woman studying English. She was a very good English learner, so I told her what I really believe about English language learning. As I talked with her, I came to realize that the way I'm trying to reach was not wrong. Although it's not easy to make ends meet right now, I think everything will be fine in the near future.

The thought of it made me think that I have got to start out doing something different in my daily life. Although I don't know what it will be, I'll find it out soon and start doing it.

Probably this entry is a little strange and most of the people reading this do not understand what is going on in my head. But, anyway I'm kind of happy, not very very happy, just a little.

Staycation

The Golden Week started out for some people. However, as for me, I have more two days to wait. Anyway, that's not a big deal. I have got little money, and I need to stay home. Therefore, it'll be just a staycation.

We didn't mean to go to the sea...

"We didn't mean to go to the sea" is the title of my favorite CD. I just used it because I really went to the sea with my old friend.

I don't remember why I went to the sea. Probably, the friend decided to do so, and I just followed. Although we were able to enjoy the scenery, we didn't have much time to be there. The place is far from where we live. It took more than 3 hours by train.

I'd like to have a more relaxed schedule next time I go on a trip to any place.

Do you give your partner a hug?

Today, I met my best friend living in Kumamoto. He came to Tokyo to visit his mentor's funeral. I ate lunch with him at T.G.I. Friday, and we ordered the same pasta. Since I didn't feel anything wrong with the dish I had, he told me it tasted too strong.

He was flying back to Kumamoto today. I asked him if his wife would give him a hug. He just said, "No way." Of course, I was kidding. But, in the states it is not unusual for a husband to give a huge hug with his wife after two day's separation.

WBC

I've been away from this blog for a while. But, I should write more often from now on.

I watched WBC (World Baseball Classic). The Japanese team won, but I was surprised that the Chinese team was much stronger than I had expected. Although baseball is not popular in Europe, the Asian teams' level is definitely getting higher.

Driver's License

It has been a while since the last time I wrote on this blog.

Anyway, recently I had one happy thing. I got a Japanese driver's license. Although I had a US license a few years ago. I couldn't convert it into a Japanese one because several months had already passed since the day I came back to Japan.

Therefore, I had to work on getting a license from the beginning and it was very hard. Especially, the written test was very difficult. I had to retake the test three times.

Well, speaking of the written test, I remember failing the written test in the US. I took the Japanese version first. But, the translation was horrible and I had to imaginze how the original Englilsh version was written while taking the test. Well, I took the English version on the second time and I passed it very easily.

Word of the year

Hmm... This is rather biased, I believe.

Don't too much rely on your dictionary.

Need to update this blog...

When I got back to Japan and started working at an English language school, one Japanese bilingual teacher asked me this question.

"How many fingers do you have?"

"I think, I have ten (fingers)," I answered.

But, he didn't say that my answer was right. Why? Let's take a look at a dictionary written for ESL learners.

According to Collins Cobuild Advanced Dictionary of American Enlgish:

Your hands are the parts of your body at the end of your
arms. Each hand has four fingers and a thumb.

He insisted that a person have eight fingers, relying on this dictionary definition. Well,...

I am not a native speaker of English, so I have been asking my American friends this question. I haven't found anyone who immediately answered "eight" yet.

Dialog for English conversation

Kana and Hide are having a conversation. Hide showed up ten minutes late. Kana looks mad.

Kana: You're late. What have you been up to? I've been waiting for you.
Hide: Sorry. From now on, I'll try not to be late.
Kana: You've said something like that before. This is the second time.
Hide: This time, I'm serious. Believe me. Give me the third chance.
Kana: Some people say, "Misfortune always comes in threes."
Hide: Well, don't get so serious. Haste makes waste.
Kana: You are driving me mad. Three-strike-out, okay?
Hide: Don't scare me, please. I am too timid to take strong words.
Kana: Whatever. Whenever I say something important, you're not listening, you know.

This dialog above was written to explain that if you put too many idioms in conversation, it would sound strange. Anyway, the dialog seems to sound strange.

After reading some comment about the dialog, I've changed a bit. It became more idiomatic.

=====================================================

Kana: You're late. What have you been up to? I've been waiting for you.
Hide: Sorry. From now on, I'll try not to be late.
Kana: You've said something like that before. This is the second time.
Hide: This time, I'm serious. Believe me. Give me a third chance.
Kana: They say, "Misfortune always comes in threes."
Hide: Well, don't be so serious. Haste makes waste.
Kana: You are driving me mad. Three strikes, you're out, okay?
Hide: Lighten up, dude.
Kana: Whatever. Whenever I say something important, you're not listening.

They should be "stamps" and "others"

Hmm...

Who is the woman?

Is she really Winona Ryder?

I can't say anything about the picture...

TOEIC Part 1 Question

a) The woman is carrying a lot of drinks.
b) The woman is putting on her glasses.
c) There are a lot of beef in her hands.
d) The woman is talking with a lot of people.

Sprite and 7UP

I found the information below through the internet. It is surprising to know that Sprite and 7UP are not sold well in Japan. Tastes differ.

Softdrink you would like to drink once again:

1. Mellow Yellow
2. Hachimitsu Lemon ("Honey Lemon")
3. Ambasa
4. Sprite
5. 7UP
6. Kiriri
7. Kocha Kaden
8. Mountain Dew
9. Dr. Pepper
10. HI-C

http://narinari.com/Nd/2006066108.html (Written in Japanese)

Never-ending journey

Keep going.

Keep going.

Even if you can't see the goal yet.

Take the same route.

Take the same route.

Even if other routes seem right.

Hold your dream.

Hold your dream.

Even if you look stuck.

Write a poem.

Write a poem.

Even if nobody reads it.

Sing the song.

Sing the song.

Even if people laugh at you.

What is the most important thing?

My room is very messy because there are a lot of books. However, I haven't even touched most of them. While trying to touch any of the stacks around my desk, I drop by a bookstore and buy another book that looks interesting.

Why does it happen? Partly because I am interested in many things, which is not a bad thing. Mostly because I can't control my schedule, though, which is a really bad thing.

Actually, I must have much more free time than most of Japanese business people. I am not working as a parttimer. I teach a few classes in a week, and I have to prepare for them. The rest is my free time.

I can see a picture hung on the wall. That says "New Year's Resolution: 2008." It says:

-Get a TOEIC score of over 950
Did I? Not yet. My maximum score is 945. Maybe the one I took last Sunday might be. But, God only knows the result so far.

- Pass STEP EIKEN (1st Grade)
Did I? Not yet. Actually, I surely know why I can't make it. Vocabulary. But, I haven't finished any vocabulary book since New Year's Day in 2008. The last time I took the EIKEN, I felt that my reading skills should be improved too. While taking the listening part, I couldn't choose the best answer despite the fact that I understood almost all of the tape because of being unable to finish reading the answer choices.

- Get a TOEFL score over 100
Did I? No. I even haven't taken the test.

And I have intended to take the Cambridge Exam (CPE) after the previous three targets are accomplished. But, none of them hasn't been conquered. So, I can't start to set a target for the Cambridge...

However, as a mater of fact, the most important thing is not to pass these exams. As you know, there are some people with higher TOEIC/TOEFL scores can't speak English fluently. Most of the EIKEN words are not frequently used. The Cambrige is said to be much better than other English language exams, but it is still just a test.

Of course, the most important thing is to keep learning English. I thought that I have learned a lot about the English language while completing my master's in TESL in the states. However, I can't be satisfied with my skills now, and I even feel my English is getting worse at times. Whenever I speak to native speakers in Tokyo, I can recognize how awkwardly I speak.

It is easy to say that it is because I don't use English now as often as I used to. But, I know many people who learned to speak better English than me only with domestic language learning. My English learning is not a competition, I am learning for myself. Whenever I hear about those people, I feel embarassed. If I didn't improve my English again, I would undervalue my MA-TESL and feel sorry for the professors who were really helpful.

Therefore, I have to try to use my free time in order to speak/write good English again and to understand English up to nearly 100%. Hope I can keep this motivation forever.

I am thinking of getting back to the states soon. Before that, though, I will start to learn English again.



Steve is a good guy. He reflects himself whenever he screws up. But, he often forgets what he reflects about. I'll try not to do the same mistake as he does.

What?

I saw these statues of owls for the first time. I have lived in Tokyo for more than 25 years, though.